Thursday, May 3, 2012

No, I don't give a shit that you work at the gym

Yeah, I'm talking to you, the desk jockey walking thrift store collection bin. Your high and mighty attitude is superseded only by your apparent disdain for soap, and it's pissing me off.

Let's get this straight here. My lack of mammaries and yoga pants means I am totally invisible or in your way. Please, go right ahead with your entire crew and gang grease the problem that I've already been patiently queuing for. Don't forget to declare the route soft for the grade, and spray me down with beta. Thanks, pal.

I understand that you have a job to do. If you need to use a station for a test, classes, coaching, setting, whatever, please, go right ahead. When the gym becomes Cloudy with a Chance of Meat-Bombz, your umbrella of intervention is greatly appreciated. Besides, those toilets ain't gonna scrub themselves.

Look broseph, I am sick of your Pope of the Rope attitude. If I wanted to pay monies to be treated like shit every time I harness up, it better involve a whip and leather.


  1. I returned to a climbing gym after a long hiatus (knee injury, climber physician told me to stay off the wall for a few months, it was bad, etc.) and decided to go easy. I hadn't climbed in a few months and this asshat just starts spitting beta at me as soon as I get on the wall. I don't respond well to unasked-for beta. Ever (dating a fellow climber who unfortunately learned that one the hard way!). Despite seeing me with other climbers with a giant pile of gear that isn't brand-new/rental, he keeps trying to give me advice. I eventually give up not because the climb was out of my reach but because I just COULDN'T listen to him.

    My pet peeve was that he was a worker at the gym who didn't identify himself as a worker. I had worked there in the past and had been told specifically never to give beta when it wasn't asked for and never to step out on the gym floor without something identifying you as a staff member.

    Lastly, he was talking about "killing" a 5...SIX. Dude, are you for real that you are bragging about this easy climb that little kids do at birthday parties when you gave someone who clearly knows what she is doing unneeded beta? I don't give a shit that you work at the gym. But you don't give beta if someone isn't asking for it. Especially if you can't even climb problems that they can climb.

  2. cloudy with a chance of meatbombz? ewe lurker?